Part 1 :Tips para sa ligtas,maginhawa, at di malilimutang pamamaalam sa mundo mula sa libro ni Bob Ong na “Ang Paboritong Libro ni Hudas”:

Part 1 :Tips para sa ligtas,maginhawa, at di malilimutang pamamaalam sa mundo mula sa libro ni Bob Ong na “Ang Paboritong Libro ni Hudas”:
1. Bago ang lahat, alamin muna ang tamang dahilan sa pagsu-suicide. Kung ang problema mo ay dahil lang namn sa wala kang pera o iniwan ka ng minamahal mo, hindi ka dapat magpatiwakal. Ang mundo ay tambak ng mga tao na pwede mong mahalin, at ang pera naman ay pwedeng kitain,kaya hindi ka dapat mawalan ng pag-asa. Ang pag kitil sa sariling buhay ay karapatan lamang ng mga taong gumagamit ng cellphone at nakikipagkwentuhan sa loob ng sinehan.
2. Kung desidido na sa gagawin mo at tingin mo ay meron kang tamang dahilan para gawin ito, ang susunod mong hakbang ay ang pagpili ng paraan ng pagkakamatay. Ang popular na paraan ay ang pagbibigti, pag-inom ng lason,pag-talon sa riles , pagbaril sa ulo(o sa puso, kung wala ka nang ulo pero buhay ka pa rin), at paglaslas ng pulso Ang mga jologs na paraan ay ang pagtalon sa mataas na gusali, pagpapasagasa sa EDSA, at pagpigil ng hininga.Tandaan na maaari ka pang mabuhay pag nagkamali ka s pagsasagawa ng mga nananggit, kaya pumili lamang ng isa na hiyang sa’yo. Bukod d’yan, marami rin sa mga paraan na ito ang makalat at nakakapangit. Dyahe naman kung pagtitinginan ng mga tao yung mukha mo sa ataul tapos mukha kang dehydrated na langaw.
3. Sumulat ng suicide note. Eto yung exciting. Dito pwede mong sisihinlahat ng tao, at wala silang magagawa. Sabihin mo na hindi mo gusting tapusin ang iyong buhay, kaso lang badtrip sila lahat. Pero wag ding kalimutann humingi ng tawad sa bandang huli para mas cool pag ginawng pelikula ni Carlo J. Caparas ang buhay mo. At tandaan, importante ang suicide note para malamn ng mga tao na nagpakamatay ka nga at hindi na-murder. Sa ganitong paraan maiiwasang ng PNP ang pagkuha sa kalye ng kahit sinong tambay bilang suspect.
4. Pumili ng theme song. Banggitin ang iyong special request sa suicide note. Ipagbilin na patugtugin ito sa prisiyon ng iyong libing. Iwasan ang mga kanta ng Salbakutah. Dapat medyo mellow at meaningful tulad ng mga kanta ng Sexbomb.
5. Isulat nang maayos ang suicide note. Printed. Iwasang magbura.Gumamit ng Scented Stationery at ng #1 Mongol Pencil. Lagdaan. Huwag gumamit ng sticker. Ilagay ang suicide note sa lugar na medaling Makita. Idikit sa noo.

Ito ang kuwento kung bakit nagsi-sinungaling ang mga lalake:

Ito ang kuwento kung bakit nagsi-sinungaling ang mga lalake:

Karpintero itong si Jojo, mahirap at may pangarap na makasali sa Wowowee, at isang araw ay gumagawa siya ng bahay sa tabi ng ilog. Sa lakas ng pagpukpok ay nalaglag ang martilyo niya sa ilog. Umiyak siya, parang si Loren Legarda noong impeachment proceedings ni Erap, at dahil dito lumitaw ang guardian angel niya. 'Tutulungan kita, Jojo,' sabi nito sabay lundag sa ilog.

Lumabas ito na may hawak na gold hammer. 'Ito ba ang martilyo mo?' tanong niya gamit ang boses na pang-call center. 'Hindi po," sagot ni Jojo. Lundag uli ang anghel at lumitaw na may silver hammer at palaka sa ulo. 'Ito ba?' tanong niya. 'Hindi rin po,' sagot ni Jojo. Lundag uli sa ilog si anghel at lumitaw na may lumang martilyo at linta sa pisngi. 'Ito ba?' tanong niya. 'Opo!' sagot ni Jojo. Natuwa ang anghel. Sabi niya, 'Dahil honest ka, Jojo, bukod sa martilyo mo, sa 'yo na rin ang gold and silver hammer...' Sa sobrang galak nag-orgasm si Jojo nang wala sa oras.

Makaraan ang ilang araw, naglalakad si Jojo sa tabi ng ilog kasama ang misis niyang siyam na buwang buntis. Dahil abala sa pagbabasa ng blind item sa tabloid, nalaglag si misis sa ilog. Iyak si Jojo; litaw uli si guardian angel na parang pulitiko tuwing may photo-op. 'Tutulungan kita, Jojo,' sabi nito sabay lundag sa ilog. Nang lumitaw si anghel kasama na niya si Paris Hilton na may dala-dala pang Bibliya. 'Ito ba ang misis mo?" tanong niya kay Jojo. 'Opo!!!!' sagot si Jojo. 'Siya po ang misis ko!' Nagalit si anghel, biglang naging jologs: 'Sinungaling kang tarantado ka! Akala ko pa naman mabait ka!'

Siyempre, nangatwiran si Jojo. 'Sorry po,' sabi niya. 'Kasi kapag sinabi kong hindi eh lulundag ka uli sa tubig at pag-litaw mo eh kasama mo si Jessica Simpson. At pag sinabi ko uli na hindi siya ang asawa ko eh lulundag ka uli at ang tunay na misis ko na ang kasama mo. At dahil sa kabaitan ko eh ibibigay mo din sa akin sina Paris at Jessica. Mahirap lang po ako, nangangarap maging contestant sa Wowowee, at hindi ko kaya ang may tatlong asawa, hindi po Quizon ang apelyido ko at hindi rin Revilla, kaya opo na lang ang sinagot ko nung una.'

Moral of the story: nagsi-sinungaling ang mga lalake for a good and noble reason.

How do you know if the guy love you?

Are you dying to know what’s in the mind of the guy you love? Is your mind in the state of confusion? Does the guy you like, really loves you or not? Are you curious to know if he is interested or moving around with other girl or not interested at all? What should be your next step to get all the information about him? Are there any guidelines available that can surely help you out?

If you want to know the answers to all these questions, then following are some ways to know whether the person is having feelings for you or not. If the person really likes you then his feelings must be reflected by his behaviour, actions or expressions.

1. Does his dressing style have changed? Check his way of dressing and presenting himself. Was he a carefree guy before meeting you? And gradually changed his attire and looks to impress you.

2. Does he glance at you more often while working? When you are busy in your work, if he gives you quick look but immediately shift to something else if you make eye contact with him.

3. Does he offer his hand of help whenever you entrap yourself in any sort of trouble? If he is always ready to help you-out with your tiniest problem to prove himself as the right person for you.

1. Is he a very chatty person who used to converse and make fun with all other friends but when he talks with you, use very sophisticated language or communicate in a very conscious manner? Observe his actions and behavior with other girls or his friends. If he waits for you or always look for the moment to share a talk with you.


2. Does his behavior remains indifferent with you and other people he meets? Notice whether he changes his attitude. If you find something different in his deeds then make a point that he is also having feelings for you.


3. Does his disposition also changes according to your mood? Whenever you feel happy, he also looks cool? But as you feel down he also becomes upset or tries various ways to make you happy directly or indirectly? If he cares for you then he definitely would put all the efforts to make you happy.

The best way to know what he wants is to ask him directly. But if you feel ‘fear of rejection’ from his side then use some indirect ways to know the reality:

Go out with other friends or talk with them very nicely, if he feels jealous or irritated, then probability of liking you is very high.

In the beginning, if he feels shy in talking to you then converse with him in a very casual manner, later-on he becomes open to you and start sharing his feelings.

If he talks you the same way as other girls then his chances of liking you is nil. Also if he got the clue that you like him and if he starts ignoring you then that is also the indication of negative feelings or hesitation.

These are some tips to try-out for knowing that the person you really love. One last suggestion; “don’t ever wait for things to happen by themselves, if you got the opportunity to show your feelings then don’t merely waste it to regret in the future”.

Finally, Did you ever wonder why there "aren't any good men out there"? Do you find it EASY to attract men, but difficult to attract the ones you WANT?

Did you sometimes feel like you can ONLY attract men you DON'T want? And do you feel like this problem's been a pattern for some time now?

word from thai that u can use...

i love you. (pom ruk koon)
i miss you. (pom kit teung koon)
can you be my girlfriend? (ben faen pom dai mai)  for yes reply "dai" and for no reply "mai dai"
i am single. (pom sot)
you are very beautiful. (koon suay mak)
you are very cute. (koon na-ruk mak)
i like your smile. (pom chorp roi yim kong koon)
can i see you tomorrow? (proong nee jer gun dai mai)  for yes reply "dai" and for no reply "mai dai"
are you free tonight? (keun nee koon wang mai)  for yes reply "wang" and for no treply "mai wang"
do you like me? (koon chorp pom reu blao)  for yes reply "chorp" and for no reply "mai chorp"
i am serious about you. (pom jing jai gup koon)
can you go out with me? (bai tee-o gup pom dai mai)  for yes reply "dai" and for no reply "mai dai"
do you have a boy-/girlfriend? (koon mee faen reu yung)  for yes reply "me" and for no reply "yung"
i think about you all night. (pom kit teung koon tung keun)
i think i have fallen in love with you. (pom kit wa pom long ruk koon)
what kind of men do you like? (koon chorp poo-chai bap nai)
can you tell me your phone no. please? (kor ber tor koon dai mai)  for yes reply "dai" and for no reply "mai dai"
do you want to go and eat with me? (bai gin kao gub pom mai )
 for yes reply "bai" and for no reply "mai"
do you want to go to watch a movie? (bai doo nung gup pom mai)  for yes reply "bai" and for no reply "mai"
can i meet your parents? (pom bai pob por-mae koon dai mai)  for yes reply "dai" and for no reply "mai dai"
i want to meet you. (pom dtong gan pop koon)
you are my angel. (koon keu nung fa kong pom)
i want to see your face every day. (pom yark hen na koon took wun)
i want to marry you. (pom dtong gan dtang ngan gub koon)
can i kiss you? (joop dai mai)
don't leave me. (ya ting pom)
i can't live without you. (pom yoo mai dai ta mai mee koon)
i never lied to you. (pom mai ker-ee gor hok koon)
i will always be on your side. (pom yoo kang koon sa-mer)
have a nice dream. (fun dee na)
take care of yourself. (do lae dtua eng duay na)
i want you to be happy. (pom dtong gan hai koon mee kwarm sook)
you make me happy. (koon tam hai pom mee kwarm sook)
i want to be with you. (pom yak yoo gup koon)
please trust me. (brot chuea jai pom)
i want you to trust me. (pom dtong gan hai koon chuea jai pom)
do you miss me? (koon kit teung pom mai)
when do you want me to come back? (koon dtong gan hai pom glup ma muea rai)
are you still living at the same place? (koon yung yoo tee derm chai mai)
i won't forget you. (pom ja mai leum koon)
your eyes are so beautiful. (duang dtar kong koon suay mak)
you are my girlfriend. (koon ben fan pom)
your love is very important to me. (kwarm ruk kong koon sam kun dtor pom mak)
please speak to me. (dai brot poot gup pom)
you hurt me so much. (koon tam pom jep mak)
can i hold your hand? (jub meu dai mai?)
love at first sight. (ruk raek pop)
my heart is yours. (hua jai kong pom ben kong koon )
i will never cheat on you (pom ja mai nork jai koon)
you are the one i have been waiting for. (koon keu kon nun tee pom ror)
you are my sweetheart. (koon keu yot -ruk kong pom)
i will be faithful to you. (pom ja seu-sut dtor koon)
i still remember the first moment we met. (pom yung jum krang-raek tee row pob gun dai)
i hope i can see you again. (pom wang wa ja dai pob koon eek-krang)
give me one more chance. (hai aow-gat pom eek-krang)
i don't want to let you go. (pom mai dtong-gan hai koon bai)
i want to hug you. (pom dtong-gan got koon)
i haven't seen you for a long time. (pom mai dai jer koon nan laew)
i miss you all the time. (pom kit-teung koon dta-lod way-la)